3.6.2 Focus on Now vs. plan for the Future - Jordi Kidsune

You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. - Wayne Gretzky

The Now vs. Future Spectrum

Welcome to the world of the now vs. future spectrum. This text will take you on a journey to explore the delicate balance between living in the present and having aspirations for the future. You'll learn about the key components that make up the foundation of this balance, and how to use them to achieve true happiness and inner peace.

You will discover:

The importance of understanding the connection between achieving a goal and experiencing happiness.
How to start a game or quest and the role of resistance and acceptance in it.
The difference between being flexible (agile) versus fixed (perseverance)

1. Recap: what was ‘success’ again?

Combine the definition of happiness with values (now), needs, and wants (future). TO DO: explain and visualize. + Definition happiness (live in now with relaxed desire for future).

Accept it, there is only now, and it is precisely as it should be. The universe is already perfect in its design; at this moment, it has everything it needs. Including its challenges for you and opportunities for growth. But as you point to the moon, you should also pay attention to the distant moon, or you would miss all of the glory (we have our imagination for a reason). Focus on the finger, but also envision the moon. Welcome to the now vs. future spectrum.

Before we start: it is your mind telling you something is amiss. But is it really (through the eyes of an alien race for example)? This is easy to recognize: it is often a fear or desire for a possibility in the future. If you want a bit more peace of mind, which I suggest, this is a neat trick to dismiss longings or fears: go to the complementary opposite of your longing or dive into the fear. Envision it, really feel it. So for example: if you want eternal glory (desire), how would you feel if nobody would know you or nobody care about you or your work? Looking for riches (desire), how would you feel being dirt poor? Afraid of a meaningless death (fear), how can you give your life meaning?

The future is neither now nor real; the future plays in your head (the moon). You are exactly where you need to be right now (the finger). Don't let your brain fool you: it is the human experience of now that matters, combined with a healthy hope for the moon. Because when you are on the moon, you will see a star in the distance (infinite hunt). But I understand, it is also a fun game to aim for the moon. But realize that you are playing a game, it is as much about playing as it is about dreaming about the finish. Select your games with care!

Flexibility vs. Perseverance

In that regard a comment: there does not have to be a connection between achieving a goal and experiencing happiness. It is a link that is always made in the west and the coaching world: “you must follow your heart and your passion, realize your goals, fulfill your dreams, know your sacred contract here on Earth. Otherwise, it is impossible to be happy”. But what if you do not find your life purpose, and your work is not an expression of your passions and ideals? Would you then have no right or opportunity for happiness? You will notice that once you have achieved your goal there will still be no rest and there will always be a new goal ready. The direct link we think there is between achieving a goal and experiencing happiness is a lie we tell ourselves (reaching the moon). It is equivalent to assuming that happiness and inner peace can be found elsewhere than in the reality of the moment (playing the game). It means that we believe that our happiness depends on something outside ourselves, that there really is something like a magical redemption from outside: a different living environment, a different job, a different man or woman, car, journey, a house in the sun or a performance. You do not feel good because you have achieved your goal, but because you are temporarily out of the need and striving.

Q: What is the main idea behind the now vs. future spectrum? A: The main idea is that there is a delicate balance between living in the present and having aspirations for the future, and understanding and utilizing this balance can lead to true happiness and inner peace.

2. How does a quest come about / how do you start a game?

Everyone is a teacher and a student at the same time. The Tragedy of Search. It is only through searching, seeking, and desiring, that the ego exists. The ego gets no satisfaction at all from accepting the here and now. The further away the goal, the bigger the ego.
The core of the quest always starts with resistance. As long as we search for more, better, different, or more complete, we are by definition displaced in the now and cannot get in touch with our creative core. Ideally, you do not want to accept the experience as true or you would like to exchange it for another immediately.
First, there is nothing more than the now. Second, you are already there (we already are on a planet…). After all, you are in the now. So what do you think outside of the now to find? Get your moons clear in sight, accept that they are fictional longings.
To enjoy the game, enjoy the now of playing and enjoy the future of a possible ending. Be in the now, while also feeling a possible future (quantum model)

The two primary patterns that shape you:

Flexibility vs. Perseverance

Q: What is the core of a quest? A: The core of a quest is resistance.

3. Let’s start with now: ‘wanting what you have’ and the importance of being in Today

In his amazing TED Talk, Harvard professor Dan Gilbert describes what he calls The Impact Bias—our “tendency to overestimate the hedonic impact of future events.” Humans have the ability to simulate future situations in our heads to predict what it’ll be like to experience them, but that simulator doesn’t always work so well and tends “to make you believe that different outcomes are more different than in fact they really are.”

Happy thoughts: here are the things proven to make you happier.

Start with gratitude, another scientifically proven route to happiness and the area in which he falls the most woefully short. Jack spends so much of his time looking up at the great things that will come his way and planning his future happiness and not nearly enough time looking down and thinking about how badly he used to want so many of the things he currently has.

Conclusion

Understanding and balancing the now and the future in order to achieve true happiness and inner peace. The key components of this balance include understanding the connection between achieving a goal and experiencing happiness, starting a quest or game with resistance and acceptance, and the difference between being flexible (agile) versus fixed (perseverance). Be sure to keep these concepts in mind as you continue on your journey of self-discovery and growth. As we move on to the next chapter, let us remember the importance of being flexible and open to change, while also staying persistent in our pursuit of our goals.

Quiz

What is the main focus of the text?

A) Living in the present

B) Achieving future goals

C) Balancing the now and the future

D) Understanding the connection between achieving a goal and experiencing happiness

Explanation: The correct answer is C) Balancing the now and the future. The text is about understanding the importance of balancing living in the present with having aspirations for the future, and how to achieve true happiness and inner peace by doing so.
What is the main trick to dismiss longings or fears?

A) Envisioning the opposite of the longing or diving into the fear

B) Ignoring the longing or fear

C) Accepting the longing or fear

D) Fulfilling the longing or fear

Explanation: The correct answer is A) Envisioning the opposite of the longing or diving into the fear. The text suggests that by envisioning the opposite of a longing or diving into a fear, it can help to dismiss it and bring more peace of mind.
What is the core of a quest?

A) Resistance

B) Acceptance

C) Searching, seeking, and desiring

D) All of the above

Explanation: The correct answer is A) Resistance. The text states that the core of a quest always starts with resistance, as long as we search for more, better, different, or more complete, we are by definition displaced in the now and cannot get in touch with our creative core.
What is the main idea behind the Tragedy of Search?

A) That everyone is a teacher and a student at the same time

B) That the ego exists only through searching, seeking, and desiring

C) That the further away the goal, the bigger the ego

D) All of the above

Explanation: The correct answer is D) All of the above. The Tragedy of Search states that everyone is a teacher and a student at the same time, that the ego exists only through searching, seeking, and desiring, and that the further away the goal, the bigger the ego.
What is the main difference between being flexible (agile) versus fixed (perseverance)?

A) Flexible is open to change and agile, while fixed is persistent in pursuing a goal

B) Fixed is open to change and agile, while flexible is persistent in pursuing a goal

C) Flexible is not open to change and not agile, while fixed is not persistent in pursuing a goal

D) All of the above

Explanation: The correct answer is A) Flexible is open to change and agile, while fixed is persistent in pursuing a goal. The text states that being flexible (agile) is about being open to change, while being fixed (perseverance) is about staying persistent in pursuing a goal.

How can I apply this today?

Take a moment to reflect on your current values, needs, and wants. Write them down in a journal or notebook.
For the next week, pay close attention to your thoughts and feelings when you're faced with a challenge or opportunity. Notice if you're thinking mainly in terms of the present or the future.
Try to implement the trick of envisioning the opposite of your longing or diving into your fear at least once a day. Write down the results in your journal or notebook.
Choose one game or quest that you want to start and make a plan for how you'll approach it with resistance and acceptance. Share your plan with a friend or family member for accountability.
At the end of the week, evaluate how well you were able to balance the now and the future in your thoughts and actions. Write down your observations in your journal or notebook.

Food for thought

How does envisioning the opposite of a longing or diving into a fear change your perspective on a situation?
What are some examples of games or quests that you've started in the past? How have you approached them with resistance and acceptance?
How does the idea of the now vs. future spectrum apply to your personal and professional goals?
Can you think of a time when you achieved a goal but didn't experience happiness as a result? Why do you think that was the case?
How can you balance being flexible and persistent in your pursuits? What are some examples of when one may be more beneficial over the other?

Expand your understanding

"The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle: https://www.eckharttolle.com/the-power-of-now/
"The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People" by Stephen Covey: https://www.franklincovey.com/the-7-habits.html
"The Art of Possibility" by Rosamund Stone Zander and Benjamin Zander: https://www.amazon.com/Art-Possibility-Transforming-Professional-Personal/dp/0142001108
"The Happiness Hypothesis: Finding Modern Truth in Ancient Wisdom" by Jonathan Haidt: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/5168.The_Happiness_Hypothesis
"The Power of Intentional Living" by John C. Maxwell: https://www.johnmaxwell.com/the-power-of-intentional-living/